The Daily Life of the Demon King

Chapter 715 - 714: The King of the Crossroads Always Seeks Profit.

Since returning to the bunker after a not-so-successful vacation in the woods — which had ended with Alex having to deal with cultists who had become part of a brainwashing experiment orchestrated by a very influential corporation — Alex just wanted to rest and do nothing. And fortunately for Alex, there were people around him who could keep him company.Alex was sitting in the bunker's library, eating strawberry ice cream and listening to Lucina, Samantha, and Seras chatting in the background. Seras had managed to beg a day off from Integra. Lucina had her legs draped over Alex's knees, occasionally stealing ice cream from him while continuing to talk with Samantha and Seras, and working on her laptop at the same time. Wednesday wasn't participating in the conversation and was simply continuing to read the diary of the old German scientist who had been obsessed with brainwashing.

While continuing to feed Lucina ice cream, Alex listened with interest to what was happening at Hellsing. But when he heard that his two little princesses, Tina and Jinx, had argued that he couldn't last a single day without problems, Alex's eyelid began to twitch. Lucina, who was about to eat ice cream from the spoon, froze with her mouth open and then burst out laughing. Samantha turned away, covering her mouth with her hand as she saw the expression on Alex's face.

"I hope Jinx and Tina didn't start fighting?" Alex asked, rubbing his twitching eyelid.

"Well… I wouldn't call it a fight. They were more like rolling around on the floor of Lady Integra's office and arguing with each other," Seras replied in an embarrassed tone, scratching her cheek with an awkward smile.

Alex, Samantha, and Lucina looked at Seras in surprise at what they heard. Even Wednesday briefly raised her gaze to look at Seras. Alex rubbed his eyes, not at all surprised that his daughters were capable of this. But from his own experience, Alex knew how strict Integra could be when it came to discipline — on the same level as Brunhilde and Alcina with certain rules.

The fact that Jinx and Tina had decided to start fighting in Integra's office could already be called something of a miracle. Alex was sure that his little princesses would face even more lessons because of it, which would prevent them from carrying out their usual gremlin activities of ruining strangers' lives.

Meanwhile, Seras was telling them how it all happened and what it ultimately led to. But no one could quite wrap their heads around the fact that Integra had simply watched as two noisy gremlins argued and rolled around on the floor of her office.

"You're saying they were rolling around Integra's office? Are you sure about that? Because she even managed to make this lazy creature work," Lucina said, starting to poke Alex's cheek with her finger.

"Not 'this lazy creature,' but your husband. And I am a very responsible worker. I always finish my work before I start slacking off," Alex said, rolling his eyes at Lucina and pushing her finger away from his face.

"At least you don't deny that you're a lazy creature. That's commendable," Wednesday said, continuing to read Wernicke's diary.

"Well… Hehehe. One look from Lady Integra was enough for Jinx and Tina to stop fighting and apologize," Seras said, chuckling slightly as she recalled how it had ended.

"Why am I not surprised. Someone wouldn't even try to scold them," Lucina said, casting a mocking glance at Alex and lightly kicking his knee with her foot.

"Why scold them? They're so cute and harmless. Just little angels," Alex said in a righteous tone, raising his palm toward the ceiling with a tender look on his face.

The girls stared at Alex with blank expressions while he was in full father mode, sincerely believing that his children were cute and harmless — even though he himself had repeatedly called his daughters gremlins. Lucina and Samantha were thinking about whether they should start listing the long list of problems that Anya, Nyaruko, Jinx, and Tina had caused in dozens of different worlds.

And their most harmless act was robbing some group and stealing only the right shoes from those people. None of the girls could understand why their daughters had stolen only the right shoes, and the daughters themselves had only said they were bored. And that was just one of the most harmless incidents; Lucina could have spent the whole day listing a long list of things the gremlins had done in other worlds.

"Should I remind you what happened on Pandora? What were you doing there? Can you remind me, dear?" Lucina asked with a sweet smile, running her foot along Alex's leg.

"Ahem, ahem… Paying for all the collateral damage," Alex said, coughing into his fist and looking away in embarrassment.

"Can you repeat that louder, dear? Because with your fake coughing I couldn't hear what you were doing on Pandora," Lucina said, grabbing Alex's face and forcing him to look her in the eyes.

"I said I was paying for all the damage my four little princesses caused on Pandora," Alex said, looking straight into Lucina's eyes.

"And they're still your little angels? Or was it not them who stole a refrigerator from some poor man to turn it into a bomb? Or was it not them who stole Scooter's car?" Lucina began asking with a sweet smile on her face.

"Of course they're still my little angels," Alex said with a serious expression, nodding his head.

"Ugh, you're hopeless…" Lucina sighed heavily, shaking her head and letting go of Alex's face.

Samantha and Seras laughed at the conversation, genuinely amused by Alex's reaction. Alex himself saw no reason not to spoil his daughters — after all, they were so adorable. Seeing the look on Alex's face, Lucina wanted to kick her husband again. But she sighed once more, glad that at least half the women in their family believed in not spoiling their daughters too much and acted like responsible parents, while the other half could hardly be called responsible parents.

At the same time, an argument broke out in the family chat where the girls split into two camps again. At that moment, the girls' phones began ringing with incoming messages. Lucina, Samantha, Wednesday, and Seras took out their phones and saw the family chat.

The loudest arguers in the chat were Loki, Hestia, and Becca, who continued to stand their ground. The four girls tactfully decided not to get involved in that conversation. Especially Lucina, who knew perfectly well that arguing with Becca was pointless.

Alex continued sitting with the girls in the bunker library, talking about everyday topics until evening. Samantha, even though she looked tired and sleepy, didn't want to go to bed because she didn't want to disrupt her sleep schedule. Closer to evening, Alex went to cook dinner, and the girls followed him.

Soon the smell of food spread through the kitchen, and the recently awakened Dean caught the scent. He was feeling hungry and sleepy. Entering the kitchen, Dean didn't say a word and simply walked over to the coffee maker to pour himself some coffee. After taking a sip, Dean sighed heavily, set the mug on the counter, and began rubbing his face to fully wake up.

"What's for dinner? I'm ready to eat anything right now," Dean said, removing his hands from his face and looking at Alex, who was cooking.

"Sausages with mashed potatoes and a fresh vegetable salad," Alex said, pointing to the plate of salad.

"Pie?" Dean asked, looking around for the pie.

"Apple," Alex replied, pointing his finger at the oven.

"You're really spoiling me," Dean said, opening the oven to look at the pie.

"If you'd actually contribute money for food, Dean. Instead of eating for free," Sam said, entering the kitchen and feeling slightly refreshed after a short rest.

"You're also eating for free. I haven't seen you contributing money for food either," Dean snapped back at Sam.

Sam looked at his brother with a calm gaze and walked over to the refrigerator. He took down a box from the top with a note that read "for food." Dean stared at the box, then looked at Alex and Sam, who were looking at him as if it was completely obvious.

Rolling his eyes, Dean reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. He took out several bills and demonstratively placed them in the box. Sam sighed and shook his head, putting the box back on top of the refrigerator. Alex just chuckled and continued cooking; he didn't care whether Dean and Sam put money in for food. After all, he had more than enough money to feed everyone in the bunker.

After finishing cooking dinner, Alex began setting the food on the table while Seras helped him. Alex sat between Lucina and Seras, and they began eating peacefully. During dinner, the girls continued talking while Alex, Dean, and Sam ate in silence, listening to the girls' conversation. When the girls finished eating, they put their plates in the sink and went back to the library, leaving Alex, Dean, and Sam in the kitchen.

Alex turned on the coffee maker to brew coffee, while Dean had already cut himself half of the apple pie.

"Dude, how does so much fit inside you? You just ate a full portion of mashed potatoes and sausages," Sam said, watching Dean.

"It's pie. There's always room in my stomach for a small piece of pie," Dean said with a smirk, returning to the table.

"That's not a small piece — that's half the pie," Sam said, pointing at the half pie on Dean's plate, which he had called a small piece.

Dean just glanced down at the half pie on his plate and shrugged, not seeing any problem with it. Alex and Sam just shook their heads as Dean calmly began eating his pie. After brewing the coffee, Alex poured the hot coffee into mugs and returned to the table.

Slowly sipping his coffee and listening to Dean happily eating the apple pie, Alex took his phone out of his pocket. Reading the latest news, Alex didn't see anything interesting except the usual headlines. He turned on a news report on his phone, set it on a stand, and began watching it together with Sam while continuing to drink coffee. Discussing the latest news, Alex and Sam shared their opinions, occasionally interrupted by Dean's comments when he called everything nonsense.

"When is Crowley going to find the Hand of God already? It's been almost a week with no news," Sam said, taking a sip of coffee and stretching slightly in his chair.

"I don't think things like that grow on trees or are sold at local flea markets," Alex replied, spearing a piece of pie with his fork.

"Can't you use your Death or Reaper tricks to search for something like that?" Dean asked, pushing his empty plate away and rubbing his stomach lightly.

"No, I can't. Unlike the previous Death, the new one doesn't make deals like that. He does his job the way it's supposed to be done," Alex said, continuing to eat pie and looking up at Dean.

"Whatever. I was just asking. Then we'll just have to wait or look for any clues," Dean said calmly, shrugging slightly and not pressing the issue.

Alex shook his head and continued drinking his coffee while listening to the news. He understood that he couldn't tell Dean and Sam everything that was happening yet — not until the right moment came. Alex had thought long and hard about when to tell Dean and Sam everything, and he preferred to choose the moment when Chuck appeared and events had reached the final stage.

Because Chuck had currently stopped following Dean and Sam's lives and was busy writing the final scene he had been preparing for so long. After finishing his coffee, Alex pushed the mug away and leaned back in his chair. Sam and Dean weren't in a hurry to leave either, continuing to listen to the news in the background — until Dean's phone suddenly started ringing. Taking the phone out of his pocket, Dean saw who was calling.

"Look who decided to get in touch," Dean said, showing who was calling.

Alex and Sam saw that Crowley was calling Dean. Answering the call, Dean began talking to Crowley. Gradually, Dean's face became puzzled, as if he didn't understand what the hell was going on. Alex and Sam tried to listen to the conversation and also exchanged glances, expressing confusion.

No one could understand how it had come to the point that Crowley was hiding from demons when Castiel, GIR, MIMI, and Stitch were with him — who could easily solve this problem. Alex even thought about contacting Castiel to ask his brother what was really happening. But by then Dean had already finished talking to Crowley and was staring at his phone screen.

"What's going on with them?" Sam asked after Dean hung up.

"This idiot said demons are on their tail and they can't return. So we're heading to St. Louis," Dean said, turning his head toward Alex and Sam.

"He has GIR, MIMI, and Stitch with him. That trio could kill all the demons in a couple of minutes," Alex said thoughtfully, stroking his chin.

"Crowley didn't say anything… But judging by the noise in the background, it seems those three don't want to work without food," Dean said, holding back a smile as he put the phone back in his pocket.

"I'm not surprised. Alright, I'll go grab my jacket. We'll run to St. Louis and back," Alex said, standing up from the table.

"Just no shadows," Dean called after the departing Alex.

As he left the kitchen, Alex waved his hand without turning his head, showing that he understood. Leaving the kitchen, Alex immediately went to the girls to tell them that he, Dean, and Sam would be gone for a couple of hours to meet up with Crowley.

The girls just waved their hands, showing that he didn't even need to tell them if he was only gone for a short while. Smiling, Alex went to his room to get dressed. Throwing on a thin black coat, Alex headed to the main hall, where Sam and Dean were already waiting.

"Where exactly does Crowley want to meet?" Alex asked, placing his hands on Dean's and Sam's shoulders.

"An abandoned building almost on Bickman," Dean said, giving the address.

Alex nodded, and at that moment they disappeared from the bunker. A moment later, Alex, Dean, and Sam appeared in an alley near the abandoned building. Once in the alley, they found themselves under a pouring rain coming down from the sky. Grimacing at the unpleasant rain, they left the alley, looking around in case demons searching for Crowley were nearby.

After making sure there were no demons around, Alex, Dean, and Sam crossed the street and began circling the abandoned building to enter inside. While circling the building, Dean wouldn't stop complaining that Alex had teleported them into the alley instead of directly inside. Now they had to get soaked in the rain.

"Did you really have to do that? It's pouring buckets out here," Dean continued complaining as he climbed over the fenced barrier.

"Stop complaining and keep moving. The last thing I need is a bunch of black-eyed idiots hanging around our house. Or do you want to start your morning with killing demons instead of coffee?" Alex said, easily jumping over the high fence.

"I'll pass. Getting wet in the rain isn't that big a problem. Right, Sam?" Dean said, jumping down from the fence.

"I agree. We've already taken in Crowley. One demon nearby is more than enough for us," Sam said, jumping down after Dean.

Alex just chuckled and lit a cigarette, ignoring the pouring rain. Reaching the back door, Alex slightly squeezed the doorknob, crushing it in his hand. Sam and Dean didn't react to what Alex had done and entered first. Shaking off the water, Alex, Dean, and Sam began moving deeper into the abandoned building.

Walking through empty corridors already covered with a thick layer of cobwebs and dust, Alex stayed behind so he wouldn't be the one to walk face-first into a web. Moving further down the corridor, Alex, Dean, and Sam began to hear Crowley's grumpy voice arguing with someone.

Coming out of the corridor, Alex, Dean, and Sam entered a spacious warehouse area. The first person they saw was Crowley, who was arguing with GIR, MIMI, and Stitch — who were threatening Crowley with violence. Further away stood Castiel with the face of someone who had simply become an accidental witness.

"Fantastic. The former King of Hell has sunk so low that he's arguing with pets. I thought you couldn't fall any lower. But apparently you can," Dean said with a smirk, looking at Crowley with a mocking gaze.

"Feeling funny, Dean? Or have all your problems suddenly been fixed?" Crowley snapped back, turning toward Dean.

Dean just rolled his eyes and walked closer to Crowley. Alex waved at Castiel, greeting his brother. Castiel nodded slightly with a smile, continuing to stand aside. But the ones who were really staring at Alex were GIR, MIMI, and Stitch.

The trio's gaze was fixed on Alex as if they were ready to eat him. And from the streams of drool dripping from their mouths, it was clear they were very hungry. Before Alex could do anything, GIR, MIMI, and Stitch began slowly sniffing the air. Catching the scent of snacks, their eyes became even hungrier than a moment before.

"FOOD!" GIR, MIMI, and Stitch shouted, having smelled the food scent coming from Alex.

GIR, MIMI, and Stitch rushed at Alex with hungry looks. Alex instantly reacted, took off the backpack from his back, and threw it aside. The trio's gazes were locked on the backpack in the air, from which the corner of a snack bag was sticking out.

The three instantly dashed after the backpack to catch it. Stitch jumped onto GIR's head, pushed off, leaped into the air, and grabbed the flying backpack. Catching the backpack in mid-air, Stitch didn't waste time on the complicated process of carefully opening it and immediately tore it apart.

Packs of snacks spilled out of the torn backpack, and GIR, MIMI, and Stitch pounced on them, fighting among themselves while stuffing snacks into their mouths. Seeing this, Alex wearily pinched the bridge of his nose, certain that these three hadn't eaten in just an hour.

"Was it really that hard to feed them, Crowley?" Dean asked, pointing at GIR, MIMI, and Stitch, who were devouring the snacks at incredible speed.

"Feed them? Are you serious? They ate an hour ago! I had to listen to their whining about being hungry for a whole week. A whole damn week!" Crowley said in an irritated tone, pointing at the trio mercilessly consuming the snacks.

"Alright, Crowley. Cut it out. Why did you call us all the way out here? Was it really that hard to shake the tail and come back?" Sam said, stopping Crowley's angry tirade.

"I couldn't. Your feathered friend isn't helping at all, and these three keep complaining that they won't work without food. I didn't sign up to be a damn nanny," Crowley said irritably, shoving his hands into the pockets of his coat.

"Well, it's either under supervision or back on the chain with Lucifer. Your choice," Alex interjected, leaning on a metal beam and smoking a cigarette.

Crowley wanted to snap back at Alex, but Alex completely ignored him and continued smoking. Exhaling irritably, Crowley figured it was better to stay in this situation than return to Lucifer and continue enduring humiliation. Dean and Sam also agreed with Alex's words; they didn't care whether Crowley was chained to Lucifer or not.

After all, they already knew that Crowley had ended up in this situation because Alex had helped Lucifer get free. But none of the three were going to tell Crowley that. They needed Lucifer free to draw Amara's attention. What had happened to Crowley was his own fault.

"So, what did you manage to find? And stop wasting time," Sam said, tired of dealing with Crowley.

"What we managed to find is the Horn of Joshua," Crowley said, slightly narrowing his eyes with a smile.

"Joshua? The one who won the battle of Jericho?" Sam clarified, looking at Crowley and then glancing at Castiel, who nodded.

"Yes, that's the one. And I intend to give it to you so you can deal with Amara," Crowley said, nodding to confirm Sam's words.

After finishing speaking, Crowley looked at Alex, Dean, and Sam, waiting for their reaction. But Alex, Dean, and Sam knew very well what kind of person Crowley was. Dean glanced at Alex, silently asking a question. Alex shook his head, showing that Crowley had managed to hide the Horn of Joshua even while in the company of Castiel, GIR, MIMI, and Stitch.

Seeing Alex shake his head, Dean and Sam realized that Crowley was up to his old tricks again. And that meant only one thing: Crowley wanted something in return; otherwise, he would find dozens of reasons why he couldn't give the Horn of Joshua to Alex and the Winchesters. Dean looked at Alex, asking what to do.

Alex thought for a moment and raised a finger, showing that they needed to play by Crowley's rules so everything would go according to plan. Dean frowned, and Sam understood what Alex meant by the gesture. Crowley waited calmly, watching this exchange of glances.

"What's with all the looks? I said I'd give it to you. I just had to hide it because we had a tail. I didn't want the demons to report everything to Lucifer," Crowley said in a calm tone, genuinely confused by the looks from Alex, Dean, and Sam.

"If?" Dean said, rolling his eyes at Crowley's attempts to justify himself.

"Is this your gratitude? You think these things grow on damn trees on every damn corner!?" Crowley said angrily, staring at Dean.

"Stop the comedy act, Crowley. Do you think we'll believe you just hid the Horn for no reason? We've known you for a long time. Even in the shittiest situation, you try to get something out of it," Dean said coldly, making it clear they didn't believe the nonsense Crowley was spouting.

"Fine. I'll give you the Horn if you help put Lucifer back in the hole he crawled out of. That is, the Cage," Crowley said, nodding.

"Deal, Crowley. Now where's the Horn?" Alex said, yawning slightly and tossing aside his extinguished cigarette.

"Where else would it be? In a safe place. Where Lucifer's bloodhounds definitely won't find it," Crowley said, turning his head toward Alex.

"Yeah, we figured as much… You probably forgot, Crowley. Even if we wanted to shove Lucifer back into the Cage, we can't do it without the Book of the Damned. And for that we need both the Book and Rowena," Dean said, starting to lose patience.

"And only Rowena knows where she hid the book," Sam added, also beginning to lose patience.

"Did I say it would be easy? No, I didn't say that," Crowley said with a cheerful smile.

"Sigh… Then maybe you know where Rowena is now?" Sam asked, pinching the bridge of his nose, trying to restrain the urge to hit Crowley.

"I suppose she's slowly rotting and feeding the worms… Lucifer snapped her neck. You can ask your friend — after all, who better than him knows who dies and who lives," Crowley said with a strained smile, nodding toward Alex.

"And you, for fuck's sake, kept quiet this whole time that Rowena is dead? Have you lost your mind, Crowley? You've been hiding at our place for a whole damn month! And only now you tell us Rowena is dead?" Dean snapped, clearly wanting to kill Crowley.

"You didn't ask, and I didn't tell. I thought your friend had already mentioned it," Crowley replied in a carefree tone, as if he didn't see any big problem with it.

Dean and Sam looked at Alex, expecting some reaction from him. At that moment, Alex was busy observing Rowena's situation. It took him no effort to locate Rowena and see how she had grabbed the Book of the Damned and escaped from Amara. Seeing how hastily Rowena had fled from Amara, Alex once again thought that Amara was apparently taking acting lessons, just like Castiel had.

Seeing that Alex wasn't paying attention to the conversation and was just staring into space, Dean cleared his throat lightly to get his attention. Hearing the cough, Alex turned to Dean and tilted his head. Dean repeated what they had been discussing and asked if Rowena was dead.

"No, she's alive. She's hiding with the book right now," Alex said, lighting a new cigarette.

"Then can you find her?" Sam asked with a sigh of relief, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets.

"Why? She'll come to us herself soon," Alex said lazily, shrugging slightly.

"What makes you think that? If she's hiding now, wouldn't it be easier for us to find her first?" Dean asked, staring at Alex.

"She's hiding from Lucifer. And she only has two options: latch onto someone who can protect her like a leech. Or contact those she supposedly can help while saving her own skin," Alex said, raising two fingers.

"Heh. Looks like someone knows Mommy's habits very well. And if she's alive, she'll definitely try to make contact. That's her style. Along with the words 'I suppose I'll help you,'" Crowley said with a smirk.

"It runs in the family… Being bastards who look for profit in any situation," Dean said, rolling his eyes at Crowley.

"I'll take that as a compliment, Dean. And since we have a deal. You help me, I help you. Everything fair and transparent, as usual," Crowley said with a businesslike smile.

"Wipe that smile off your face or I'll kick you. You're already freeloading in our house," Alex said, rolling his eyes and preparing to leave.

"Yes, yes, whatever you say. So, can we go back now? As absurd as it sounds, I'd prefer to return to my little closet," Crowley said, shrugging in response to Alex's words.

"Should've kicked you out back then. There would be fewer problems now," Dean said tiredly, following Alex.

Crowley just smirked and followed Alex and Dean. Sam looked at Castiel and nodded, showing they could return. However, as they were leaving, no one noticed that the ever-noisy trio had disappeared somewhere. Exiting through the back door onto the street, Alex and Dean saw dozens of human corpses, and next to them GIR, MIMI, and Stitch were rummaging through the corpses' pockets, turning out their wallets.

The smell of sulfur immediately hit Alex and Dean's noses, confirming their thoughts that these people had been demons. Crowley came out after them, whistled slightly at the sight, and smirked.

"Well, at least no one will be chasing us thanks to certain someone," Dean said sarcastically, turning his head toward Crowley.

"Oh, what a delicate flower you are. When you and your brother were hiding from the Leviathans before, you didn't say that. And I could have handed you over to Dick at any moment," Crowley said, walking past Dean.

"Bastard…" Dean hissed through his teeth.

"Don't sulk, darling. Everything will be fine," Crowley said with a cheeky smile.

Dean reached behind his back, wanting to draw the Blade of Cain. But Alex put a hand on Dean's shoulder and just shook his head. Dean sighed and released the hilt of the Blade of Cain, trying to suppress his irritation. After finishing their business in St. Louis, Alex whistled to get GIR, MIMI, and Stitch's attention so they would stop robbing the dead demons.

When GIR, MIMI, and Stitch clung to Alex's body, he placed his hands on Dean's and Sam's shoulders and was ready to leave. Castiel put a hand on Crowley's shoulder. And in the next instant, they all disappeared from St. Louis.

The moment Alex returned to the bunker, he didn't have time to react before Seras appeared beside him. Seras instantly scooped up the stunned GIR, MIMI, and Stitch and ran off with them in her arms. Alex, Dean, and Sam watched as Seras carried away the noisy trio and exchanged glances.

"Beer?" Dean suggested, looking at Alex and Sam.

"I'm not against it. We can watch a movie too," Alex said, shrugging and lightly stroking his chin.

"Why not," Sam said, taking off his jacket and leaving the main hall.

Dean followed Sam to get beer from the refrigerator, while Alex went to the girls to tell them what had happened before heading to the recreation room. Quickly telling them that Crowley was still the same bastard who loved to take advantage of the situation, Alex headed to the recreation room, changing into home clothes with magic on the way.

To be continued...

(So, we're starting to smoothly move along the main plot. As I already said, I'm not going to show anything related to other horror franchises anymore, and we'll be moving only along the Supernatural plot, towards the end. I don't know how long this will take, so I'd rather rewatch season 11 of the show to remember everything better. I remember all the main events, but as usual, I have trouble with timelines. As you know, time in series is such a thing; it's supposed to be there, but if you see it for yourself, you'll see. Hehe. I'm going to eat. Peace, love, and if you're hungry, just eat.)

Early access to chapters on my patreon: p*treon.com/GreedHunte