Reincarnated as the Villainess's Unlucky Bodyguard

Chapter 125 Welcome to Hell Training

the training grounds were larger than i'd expected, a sprawling arena of dirt, stone, and magical wards designed to keep us from dying. or maybe to contain the carnage i wasn't sure. seraphis stood in the center like a conqueror surveying her domain, her golden eyes gleaming with sadistic delight.

"this," she announced, gesturing grandly, "is where you'll spend the next several weeks becoming something resembling competent."

"great," i muttered under my breath. "can't wait."

"you'll start with basic drills," seraphis continued, ignoring me entirely. "physical endurance, magical control, combat tactics. by the end of today, you'll wish you were back in that cafeteria being kidnapped."

"charming motivational speech," i quipped.

"silence, silverthorn," she snapped, her voice as sharp as a blade. "unless you'd like to start with laps?"

i grimaced. "pass."

enara stood beside me, already looking more composed than i felt. the princess was annoyingly good at hiding her nerves.

"and you," seraphis said, turning to her, "will need to shed your reliance on royal status. out here, you're just another student."

"yes, ma'am," enara said with a polite nod.

"brown-noser," i whispered.

enara shot me a glare.

before seraphis could launch into another lecture, ananara spoke up from his spot on a nearby stone. "if this is supposed to be intimidating, it's failing spectacularly. i've seen more terrifying displays from a fruit vendor during a sale."

"is there a reason you brought that with you?" seraphis asked, pointing a sharp finger at ananara.

"he's my familiar," i said defensively.

"then control him," she snapped. "or i will."

ananara chuckled darkly. "oh, please, principal. you couldn't handle me if you tried."

"want to bet?" seraphis's smile was downright predatory.

"ananara, maybe don't antagonize the person in charge of whether or not we survive this," i said hastily.

"i'm merely providing commentary," ananara replied, utterly unrepentant.

the system's voice echoed in my mind. [host, your familiar's behavior is increasing the probability of additional punitive drills by 60%.]

thanks for the heads-up, i thought sarcastically.

"now," seraphis said, clapping her hands together, "let's begin. liria, enara start with a warm-up. five laps around the arena."

"five laps?" i groaned.

"would you like to make it ten?"

"nope, five is fine," i said quickly.

enara and i set off at a jog, though calling it a "warm-up" was generous. the arena's perimeter felt like it stretched forever, and the uneven ground didn't make it any easier.

"you're slow," enara said, barely winded.

"i'm pacing myself," i shot back, panting.

"pacing yourself for what? a nap?"

i glared at her. "remind me why we're friends again?"

"because no one else can stand you."

ananara's voice carried across the arena. "she's not wrong, host!"

"do you want to get punted into the next dimension?" i yelled back.

"focus!" seraphis barked.

by the time we finished the laps, i was ready to collapse. enara looked marginally better, though even she was sweating.

"good," seraphis said, barely glancing at us. "now for the fun part."

"define 'fun,'" i muttered.

she gestured, and a row of practice dummies materialized in a flash of light. "you'll be practicing your combat techniques. liria, use your black flames. enara, focus on your darkfire manipulation. and don't hold back."

"ladies first," i said, gesturing to enara.

she rolled her eyes. "coward."

"realist," i corrected.

enara stepped onto the path, her movements swift and deliberate. she timed her steps perfectly, weaving through the pendulums like it was a choreographed dance.

"show-off," i muttered, stepping onto the path after her.

the first pendulum swung toward me, and i ducked just in time. the second one came faster, forcing me to leap to the side.

[host, your reaction time is below optimal levels. suggest increased focus to avoid decapitation.]

you don't say, i thought, narrowly avoiding another blade.

by the time i reached the other side, my heart was pounding, and my legs felt like jelly. enara was already waiting for me, looking smug.

"took you long enough," she said.

"try that with black flames and a pineapple heckling you," i shot back.

ananara's voice carried across the training ground. "if this is your best, host, we're all doomed."

"do you want to trade places?" i yelled.

"unfortunately, i am far too valuable to risk," he replied.

seraphis's voice cut through our bickering. "enough! keep moving."

the next obstacle was a series of platforms suspended over the pit of lava. some of them wobbled dangerously, while others shot jets of fire at random intervals.

"why is there always lava?" i asked no one in particular.

"because it's effective," seraphis said, clearly enjoying our suffering.

enara jumped onto the first platform, her balance impeccable. she moved quickly, leaping from one platform to the next with the grace of a cat.

i followed, less gracefully. the first platform tilted as soon as i landed, and i had to windmill my arms to keep from falling into the molten abyss.

[host, your agility stat suggests a 60% chance of success on this obstacle. recommend strategic planning over brute force.]

what part of this looks like brute force to you? i thought, jumping to the next platform just as a jet of fire shot up beneath me.

"liria, hurry up!" enara called from the other side.

"i'm trying not to die, thank you very much!"

the final jump was the worst. the platform i was on wobbled violently, and the gap to the next one seemed impossibly wide.

[host, activating agility boost to enhance your odds of success.]

suddenly, my body felt lighter, my movements more precise. i launched myself into the air, landing awkwardly but safely on the other side.

"made it," i gasped, collapsing onto the ground.

"barely," enara said, offering me a hand.

i ignored it, too tired to care about appearances.

seraphis approached, her arms crossed. "pathetic. but at least you didn't die."

"high praise," i muttered.

"don't get comfortable," she said. "this was the easy part."

"what's next?" enara asked, her tone more curious than concerned.

"combat drills," seraphis said with a wicked grin. "and this time, i'll be your opponent."

ananara's laughter echoed once more. "oh, this should be good."

[host, prepare yourself,] the system said. [your odds of survival just dropped to 40%.]

why do i even bother? i thought, dragging myself to my feet.

as seraphis summoned her weapon, a wicked-looking spear crackling with energy, i couldn't help but wonder if this training was really about improvement or just her idea of fun.