A Joytoy's Journey to become a Hive-Queen [A SCS Fanfic]

Chapter 71 – Fractured Unity, or: Being a Hive-Mind is hard

Chapter 71 – Fractured Unity, or: Being a Hive-Mind is hard

“Some people think Samurai are heroes. Others think they are monsters. In my opinion, both are correct. In general, they like to help people, saving them from the plant aliens and corporate greed alike, but they become downright monstrous if you eat the last cup of yoghurt. Ever went to take a shower, only for it to suddenly electrocute you? That makes you rethink your life choices.”

- Evelin ‘Maniac’ Vance, after eating GroundWire’s last cup of yoghurt.

“Nobody eats my last yoghurt!”

- GroundWire

With a flourish we cut down the model Five in front of Us. We had gotten the drop on it, finding the cave in a bit of disarray after one of the Silthen’s went through with their toxins. It made dealing with the xenos so much easier, and we had only added to the confusion with the help of our holograms.

Chloe and Bobby had dealt with the Hive structures in short order, and we were just about to carry on, when Junior contacted Us.

“My Queen. There iss ssomething I would like to talk to you about.”

Turning our attention to her with our virtual self, our body self continued on, following the others into yet another tunnel.

“What is it?”

“I have taken some time to talk to Kayssa about your body modificationss. We have the pointss and mosst of the cataloguess, we can obtain the Vi’xan catalogue and upgrade it as needed. We can alsso work without you pressent, we have the Sspotterss for purchassess, and we have the capability to produce more of Uss without your oversight. There really issn’t a reasson you shouldn’t be able to get them now, and I do believe it would be helpful in the near future.”

That did surprise Us. Okay, that wasn’t entirely true. Once she mentioned it, we became aware of her discussions. Really, it was very weird to know something but not knowing that you knew it. It wasn’t a new sensation, of course, but that didn’t make the disorientating feeling of it any better.

Mentally replaying the broad strokes of their conversation, we frowned. The body modifications would be incredibly helpful, and we did want them, but some of the topics that were raised left Us feeling... undecided. We weren’t sure exactly how we felt about it all, the knowledge that it would basically replace our body.

Of course, we had known that the changes would be extensive. But on the other hand, we also hadn’t spent much time really thinking about it. What would it mean for Us? The others had already come to the conclusion that it might mean losing part of our humanity, and now that we took a moment to think it through, we could understand that fear. Shared it, even.

Not to mention that it would take me out of commission for a not insignificant amount of time, which was another thing that didn’t sit well with me while we were on this expedition. But Junior was also correct that the rest of Us could work without me present.

Still, the thought was... unsettling. And we weren’t quite sure why.

Ever since we became a Hive-Mind, we didn’t really have any compunctions of doing things in a non-human way. Yes, we had feared Chloe’s and Jenna’s reactions to the inner workings of the chorus, but that was more about their opinion on Us, not if we should have done it in the first place.

Even when we first got the upgrade we didn’t think much about it. Yes, we might not have known the extent to what it would mean to become a Hive-Mind, but we did know that it was decidedly non-human, and it didn’t bother Us too much at the time. Nor did we regret the decision.

It wasn’t like we were still human in the same way other humans were. And getting the body modifications also wouldn’t mean we couldn’t retain our human perspective. That was something that was born from Us, well, being human at the core. The entire chorus was built upon a human, upon me, as the basis. While they might differ individually, the core of Us would remain the same, no matter what form our bodies took.

Even for me, you could make the argument that I was no longer human in a very important way. Being a Hive-Mind is fundamentally very different from being human, and that had been rather apparent already. So there really wasn’t a reason that this should change anything.

“We fear no longer being human. But why? It’s not like we aren’t in large part Hexclaw already.”

“Perhapss it iss jusst human nature? There are many thingss I would conssider Hexclaw nature, and they expresss themsselvess quite openly in Uss. That difference might be what iss sspurning Uss on to doubt oursselvess.”

“What do you mean?” We did know what she talked about with the others, but we couldn’t read thoughts. Each of Us was their own person, which was part of what made Us so unique.

“I have already noticed ssome disscrepanciess in the way we conduct oursselvess, compared to what you might expect. We might play at being a true Hexclaw Hive-Mind, yet we do not really act like one. Jusst think about the way we lack cooperation. The misstake you made in the fight with the model Eighteen. A true Hexclaw Hive-Mind wouldn’t have made that misstake, they would have been in perfect tune with one another. I do not blame you for it, I do not think any of Uss do, but it doess show a certain difference in approach. If we want to continue to grow and learn, we have to find our own path, combining both our naturess.”

There was a short pause, one in which she obviously searched for the right words.

“Ever ssince we became a Hive-Mind, we did thingss the way we thought they musst be done. We insstinctually created a moduss operandi for Uss, without delving deeper into what it meanss to be a Hive-Mind. Then we ssaw the Devourer of Worldss, and ever ssince then we fixated on it ass our primary point of comparisson. We let the fear of becoming that hamper Uss, the fear that our human sside iss pushing, and one we have to keep in mind. But it alsso shouldn’t define Uss. We have to learn how to be a proper Hive-Mind, and we have to learn that for oursselvess. We cannot ssimply look to otherss to try and figure thiss out. I alsso think that Knight Chloe’ss doubtss around our nature hass rubbed off on Uss in unsseen wayss.”

“Very likely. Her doubts made sense, and it is only natural to be drawn into fear and anxiety. Fear is a survival response, it makes you aware that something is wrong and that you aren’t safe. But it can also hinder progress. How many people had to overcome their fear to try new things for humanity to get where we are now?”

“Precissely. It iss why I am of the opinion that it iss now on Uss to take that ssame leap of faith. We are ass prepared ass we are going to be, unlesss we wait for the limiter to be deactivated. And it iss my hope that that won’t be such a big isssue, once we learn how to work together properly. Jusst remember what the Devourer of Worldss could do with only a few droness. Even if they might be sstronger and more powerful, sso were the antithessiss. Yet, they were sstill able to deal with them without much trouble. We can do the ssame, if only we ssit down and accept that we need a different approach to our methodss.”

With a sigh, we rubbed our face. Not that it was needed, considering that we were conversing with her from our virtual realm. Still, it felt good. Absently we stared at our hands. It was a definitively human action, and that just didn’t help Us at all.

“Maybe we should discuss this with all of Us. We need to decide as a whole, as Myriad. I have my bias, you have yours. We all have our own. Unless we actually come to a conclusion as a whole, none of this really leads anywhere.”

“That iss another thing I have obsserved. You do not act like a Hive-Queen would, you leave Uss mosstly to our devicess. That iss not precissely an isssue, but it iss yet another indicator. In the ssame vein, we alsso do not act like we should. We are not the same ass any other Hexclaw Hive, we are unique. We are individualisstic, and we should all keep that in mind. We shouldn’t jusst obey, we should quesstion. Disscussions of that level are our sstrong ssuit. Sso far we wassted that quite ssignificantly. It iss our duty to make ssure the choruss can work in harmony, that fallss to all of Uss. And ssometimess that will mean dissagreementss. But dissagreementss are what push Uss further.”

We weren’t quite sure if we agreed to that, but we were also aware that that was another human fear. That loss of control, of no longer being in charge. Rationally, we knew that wouldn’t happen. Even with disagreements, there was a strict hierarchy, one that we all would follow. Not doing so was simply not part of the chorus. In a way, that knowledge was calming. We were certain of that, no question.

Yet, we couldn’t help but fret.

“Okay. Let’s talk to the others. We’re just not quite sure if we should do so now, with all the antithesis we need to deal with.”

“Isn’t that a pretty good reason for why we need to do it now?” The voice belonged to Snuffles, who was now joining the conversation. “You should have noticed how well we can multitask, no?”

That made Us frown, and we thought about it. She was right. The fact alone that we were talking to them, while we continued to kill any aliens that we found was already a pretty good indicator. At the same time, we had that implant. The others didn’t.

“Yess. That iss an obsservation I have alsso already made. We can multitassk quite well, it jusst never really came up, at leasst until now. That iss another thing we need to keep in mind. Each part of Uss hass certain sstrengthss and weaknesssess, we need to find a balance between them.”

“Alright... Let’s chat.”

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